First Date

The #1 Mistake Men (and Women) Make on a First Date

Let me paint the picture of a first date.

Male perspective: You’re on a date with an amazing woman. You asked her out and are excited to be with her. During the date, she asks you a bunch of questions. Being a good guy, you go with the flow and answer her questions. You get her laughing and weave in a fun story or two. At the end of the evening, you think you were a great date, and the date was a success.

Female perspective: You are excited about going on a date with a great guy. At the end of the evening, you shake your head in dismay. You spent two hours with this guy over dinner, and he didn’t ask you ONE question! You start to wonder how great this guy is, and definitely don’t think he’s interested in you.

Both the man and the woman read the situation differently. Both were off base.

It’s a classic trap men fall into time and time again.

It’s also a classic trap women fall into.

This is the #1 thing men and women misunderstand on a first date.

Why does this happen?

In guy code, you ask a question if you want to know something. It’s that simple.

In gal code, when you ask a question you expect the other person to ask a question back. Women know this law of exchange — I ask you a question, you ask me a question. Simple.

You see the disconnect here? Both are right, yet put it together on a date and it can spell disaster.

Not only does the woman leave the date feeling he’s not very interested in her, the man misses out on the chance to get to know his date. It’s highly unlikely there will be much connection when this happens.

What to do?

Rx for Guys: Ask your date some questions. Even interrupt her if you need to, yet be sure to express interest.

Rx for Ladies: Let the conversation flow. You don’t need to carry it. Let him address the awkward lulls in conversation. Don’t make it so easy on him. Don’t ask 20 questions. He asked you out, so let him carry the conversation. This gives him ample room to ask you questions. If your date can’t carry the conversation, better to know that now.

Try this out on your next first date, and report back!